Original Sin, Moral Bankruptcy, and Free Will

"Morally Bankrupt" is a term used in AA for the state of we alcoholics. I get that. I totally get it. Two days ago I came face-to-face with the term and what it means to me. It's related to the concept of "original sin." You see, I never could believe babies were born with "original sin" yet I spent my life believing I was the epitome of original sin. And guess what - I think babies are born pure and innocent and completely without sin, but we all lose our innocence and that, my friends, is original sin. I am, indeed, morally bankrupt, but the first withdrawal that made me that way was done when I was a little child with no resources, psychological or intellectual or even spiritual, to replace that which was withdrawn. My innocence was taken from me before I had any free will. Of course, free will comes to us all at some point. And with my early childhood bankruptcy and further withdrawals by smother, the church, etc. I of course had a heck of a time pulling out of that bankruptcy even with my free will. I guess I never did. I remain morally bankrupt, and emotionally bankrupt, and psychologically bankrupt. I rejoice that I never hurt anyone like I was hurt. I am ashamed of how I have hurt the ones I love and even myself. I see how that which was done to me as a child caused such a bankruptcy and how despite my efforts I remain bankrupt. I'm amazed that I have built a life that is in many ways rich and beautiful. It's really very sad and hopeful. It's the thing that makes me cry.